Tag: goals


Make 2018 the Year of the Right Regrets

8 Ways to Avoid the Wrong Regrets in 2018

Like most people, my biggest regrets in life have been the things I didn’t do as opposed to things I did do.

One of my biggest regrets was not studying abroad in Australia while I was in college. I’d waited too late to inquire about it, when I had only one semester of school left.

This was a big regret because I’d always wanted to go to the land Down Under ever since I was a little girl.

Since I didn’t get to go in college, I tried to make up for it several years later by taking a month-long vacation to Australia as a gift to myself for my 30th birthday. 

The Cons

There were a lot of reasons not to go on the trip. 

Like the fact that it cost a good chunk of money. 

And that I was in the midst of a new relationship.

Or that I would have to go by myself since none of my friends could take off that much time from work.

The Pros

But there were also a lot of other reasons for me to go.

The trip would occur during my birthday. I’ve always wanted a summer birthday, and in the Southern Hemisphere I’d get to have one.

I’d be gone during winter break, the same time my students at the college I worked at would also be away. Therefore I wouldn’t put an extra burden on my co-workers.

I had enough time built up to take off 7 weeks from my job at the time (and still had an extra 10 days of vacation left over). 

Also, being single with no children made travel and travel planning easy. It could be another 18–20 years before I’d have that kind of freedom again!

Not Letting the “Maybes” Cloud My Judgment

I can remember my initial thoughts when trying to decide to book the trip or not. They went a little something like this:

“Maybe I should wait until I’m married and go to Australia on my honeymoon.”

OR

“Maybe I should wait until I’m retired when I have more time and money.”

I quickly pushed those thoughts aside. 

I knew there was no guarantee I would even be physically able to go when I retired. 

And why in the world would I want to wait on some man to take me when I can do this now?

So, I hopped online, did a little research, and found a very reasonably priced flight. 

I still wasn’t sure how I was going to pay for a month-long excursion, but I had 9 months to figure it out.

I gave myself a few days to sleep on the information I’d researched. And then I booked my trip.

No Regrets (Except One)

I’ve never regretted my decision. 

In fact, if I hadn’t done it then, I would’ve spent the past 15 years regretting it. 

My only regret? 

Not doing it sooner.

8 Ways to Avoid the Wrong Regrets in 2018

1. Don’t settle for “good enough.”

“Most people settle for ‘good-enough.’ Their diet, dating partners, job, income, and relationships are all merely ‘good-enough.’ But since their choices are common, that’s what their life becomes.” — Anthony Moore

I could’ve settled with my “maybes.” 

I could’ve blindly accepted my initial thoughts of deferring the trip until I was married or retired. 

And I could’ve rationalized those thoughts were a “good enough” plan.

But guess what? Fifteen years later I’m still not married and I’m not even close to retirement. 

In fact, since then, I left the security of a job with retirement benefits to start my own business (something else I don’t regret).

While today I’m probably the healthiest I’ve ever been in my life, undoubtedly due to leaving a 9–5 job working for someone else, I know I wouldn’t have the energy I had when I was 30 to do all the rock climbing, hiking, and snorkeling I did in the heat of the Outback and the waters of the Great Barrier Reef.

Every day I’m so glad I didn’t settle for “good enough.”

I encourage you not to settle for just “good enough.”

2. End the wrong relationships.

So what about the relationship I’d just started a few months before going to Australia? It ended one week after I returned. 

Even though it was heartbreaking, looking back I’m so glad the relationship didn’t work out. (What a regret that would’ve been if it had!)

Don’t wish you hadn’t wasted time in an unhealthy relationship. 

Instead, start the year knowing you can make it on your own and you’ll be available for an even better relationship before or by the end of the year. 

3. Say no to opportunities that don’t support your life mission statement.

Speaking of relationships, I’ve written before about how I had to make the decision to end a relationship a little over a year ago because I recognized it didn’t allow me to fulfill my mission in life. 

Having a life mission statement in place will help you to say no to choices you’ll regret later. 

4. And say yes to opportunities that do support your life mission statement. 

A life mission statement will also help you say yes to some pretty cool things you hadn’t previously challenged yourself to.

Even if nothing materializes from these opportunities by the end of the year, you can know it wasn’t time wasted because these things will have led you further in fulfilling your mission in life, which may lead to something even bigger and better down the road!

5. Learn something new.

Don’t let another year pass having not learned the one thing you’ve always said you wanted to learn. 

Instead, end the year knowing you’ve developed a new skill. 

I personally have always been a big believer in lifelong learning and continually encourage my clients to embrace also it.

Just recently I started learning Italian. I hope by the end of 2018 I’ll be somewhat proficient in it.

I may never have an opportunity to use it in my future. But at least I’ll have further developed the language center of my brain and added a new skill to my repertoire. 

(Even if the only thing I learn is how to say “food” in Italian [“cibo”], I know I’ll be able to survive getting lost in any future trips to Italy!)

6. Start that side hustle or passion project.

“The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now.” — Chinese Proverb

If there’s something you’ve wanted to start, whether a hobby, a side business, or a passion project, what are you waiting for? 

Just start!

Don’t put any pressure on it to be perfect or even successful. Just let it be a creative or fun outlet for you from your everyday routine. 

Let it evolve and be open to what it might grow into organically.

For instance, a few years ago I started writing a blog about my adventures in stand up paddling and the spiritual parallels of those adventures. It was really just a place for me to record and preserve my thoughts. I didn’t promote it at all. 

My little side project turned into my 2nd published book, which eventually helped fund my recent mission trip to the Amazon jungles of Brazil.

You never know what can happen with your own passion project. And you’ll definitely never know if you never start.

7. Turn your side hustle into your full-time gig. 

If you start to see some momentum with your side hustle and discover a market for it, it may be time to consider turning it into a full-time gig. Especially if you already know how to think like an entrepreneur.

It was much easier for me to start my own business after working it part-time for 9 months before going full-time with it. 

But, eventually I had to pull the trigger and take a leap of faith because I knew it would never be the right (or perfect) time to leave my job and pursue my business full-time.

While being an entrepreneur isn’t for everyone, if you’ve got the desire to do your own thing and you’ve calculated the risks and counted the costs, this year may be the year to give it a go.

If it doesn’t work out, you may have some regrets, but you won’t die.

And you’ll never have to live with the regret of never having tried. 

You may even experience freedom and success like never before!

8. Develop your positive self-talk.

You’ll never be able to accomplish the above if you keep listening to your negative-self talk

What if I had listened to my “maybes”? 

What if I had told myself I couldn’t go to the other side of the world by myself? 

Well, I don’t have to wonder “What if?”

Instead, I have memories of the places I visited, the beauty I experienced, the wildlife I saw, and the people I met. Some of whom I still keep in touch with to this day. 

When you start to hear the negative thoughts that are determined to keep you in just a “good enough” existence, re-frame them with positive self-talk. 

Stepping Out in Faith

Shortly after I’d stepped out in faith and booked my dream vacation to Australia, things started to fall into place. 

I found a fun part-time gig to help me earn a little extra money for the trip. 

Also, I received a sum of money previously owed to me which covered the remainder of my cost for the trip. 

And remember how I said I was able to take 7 weeks off of work and still have 10 vacation days left over? This all occurred because at the time I worked for a state university and for two years in a row we didn’t receive a raise. 

To compensate us for it, we were all given 20 extra vacation days on top of our annual 3 weeks’ vacation time for salaried employees. 

Add in to that amount the holidays we all got off during winter break and I had it made!

I was able to spend Thanksgiving with my family before leaving for Australia. 

Then I spent my birthday, Christmas, and New Year’s Down Under. 

Finally, I was able to have a week for some much-needed rest and time to readjust my internal clock before returning to work, just in time for the students’ return to campus.

Without the vacation compensation, I probably wouldn’t have had so much time to really relish the experience. 

The timing turned out to be perfect and “the stars aligned” for it to all work out. But I had no way of predicting all those things would happen. I didn’t have a crystal ball telling me it would all work out. 

I just had to take a chance while at the same time being smart about it. And I’m all the better for it. 

Now I have no fear of traveling alone (or doing anything else alone for that matter). 

I have more knowledge about the history of one of the most fascinating continents on earth and a new respect its native people, the Aborigines. 

I no longer have a fear of bugs. (Sleeping on the ground in the Outback where the spiders are the size of your fist will help you overcome your fear pretty quickly!)

I encourage you to commit to at least one of the 8 ways to avoid the wrong regrets in 2018. 

If you can commit to all 8, you’ll likely end the year with only the right regrets.

And who knows where those will lead you in the years to come! 

If you want to make 2018 the year of the right regrets, subscribe to my 8-Step Goal-Achievement Plan to start setting the right goals for your future!

Are You Where You Wanted to Be at The End of 2017?

In January, I wrote a post entitled “Where Do You Want to Be At the End of 2017?

I shared with you my goals for the upcoming year, along with three challenges to you the reader:

  • Try something new you’ve always wanted to try and make it happen this year.
  • Find at least one way to step out of your comfort zone this year.
  • Set at least one goal you want to achieve by the end of the year.

Today, I’m asking myself, “Am I where I wanted to be at the end of 2017?”

The answer to that question is yes, and no.

Because, as we all know, life happens which can sometimes mess up our plans.

“If you want to make God laugh, tell Him about your plans.” Woody Allen

2017 Goal Re-cap

Sometimes, either goals don’t happen, they get altered, or they get delayed. This happened with some of the goals I shared in my post in January.

The 2017 Goal That Never Happened

First, my goal to experience tiny living didn’t happen for various reasons. It’s still something I want to do, but will have to become a goal for sometime in the future.

The 2017 Goal That Was Altered

Second, my goal for my very first mission trip got altered.

Originally, I was supposed to go to Brazil in March with my own church where we would travel down the Amazon River on a boat and sleep in hammocks while making stops in small communities along the river to help with everything from construction and home visits to ministry.

Unfortunately, my church didn’t have enough people signed up for the trip to make, so I got assigned to a different group for a mission trip scheduled for July.

This trip would still go to the same area, but instead would involve teaching jungle pastors at a small, makeshift conference center overlooking the Amazon River. Instead of the experience of staying on a boat while traveling to various villages, the pastors of those villages came to us.

When Changes Occur for the Best

This actually worked out much better than the original plan for several reasons.

One, after an unexpected complication from an unexpected surgery in late January and an extended recovery time, I wouldn’t have been physically able to go on this trip in March. But by July I was doing much better.

Two, the type of work this particular trip required was much more in line with my gifting and my skillset. God was able to use me in the best way possible.

Three, when I arrived in the jungle, I saw the boat I would have stayed on had I gone in July, and I realized, that trip would have been too far outside my comfort zone!

The challenge of no A/C, sub-par plumbing, limited electricity, and learning to communicate with those who speak a different language was just the right amount of discomfort I needed to learn to appreciate from my first mission trip.

I was in what’s called the learning zone (the area where you’re outside your comfort zone but not so far outside it that you panic and therefore are unable to learn anything from your experience).

One of the 2017 Goals I Accomplished

Finally, I was able to accomplish my goal of helping more people in my business get unstuck in their careers and find a new direction that complemented their passions.

But even that goal was delayed because of my surgery. But I accomplished it and have the same goal for 2018.

Are You Where You Wanted to Be At the End of 2017?

Now I’m asking, are you where you wanted to be at the end of 2017?

If not, why?

The good news is, there’s still some time left in this year. And, come January 1st, you get a clean slate of 365 days to work with.

What’s one new experience you want to have in 2018?

What’s one way you can step out of your comfort zone in the new year?

What goals do you want to achieve in 2018?

Don’t let time get away from you. Learn how to achieve all of the above with my complimentary 8-Step Goal-Achievement Plan by subscribing to my newsletter.

It’s Not Too Late! How to Salvage the Last Half of 2017

In a few days we’ll begin the last half of 2017. Can you believe we’re already halfway through the year?!

For me, 2017 has already been filled with ups and downs, as I’m sure it has also been for you. The mid-point of the year is always a good time to:

  • Review the goals you set at the beginning of the year.
  • See which ones you accomplished.
  • Re-commit to the ones you have yet to accomplish.

My Passion Planner has an entire section devoted to doing just that between its June and July pages. (I really love having a paper calendar again!)

There may have been some bumps in the road since January to cause you to get behind on your goals. But, there’s still some time to re-focus and catch up.

5 Steps to Salvaging the Last Half of 2017

  1. Think back to what your goals were at the beginning of the year. Did they include discovering new passions? Making more money? Starting or completing a special project? Finding a new job or new career?
  2. Find your notes where you put these goals down in writing. If you didn’t write them down, then DO SO NOW! Did you know, people who write down their goals are 50% more likely to achieve their goals than those who don’t?
  3. Start breaking your goals down into smaller goals. See if you can set a deadline of December 31st, 2017 to some, if not all, of these smaller goals.
  4. Begin working on your smaller goals TODAY. By doing so, you should be able to accomplish at least part of the bigger goals by December 31st as well.
  5. Don’t beat yourself up if this deadline doesn’t seem realistic for each goal. Right now, just focus on what you can accomplish by the end of the next six months. Once you have, you’ll gain more momentum and more motivation going into 2018.

Resources to Assist You in the Last Half of 2017

A dismal first half of the year doesn’t have to destroy your hopes for an improved you.

One quick way to get back on track is to utilize the on-demand resources offered by paNASH. These videos focus on topics related to improving your work and your life. They’re broken down into smaller video segments, making them quick and easy to access anytime online. They come with handouts to guide you through every step of your goal, whether it includes:

  • Pursuing your passions.
  • Making more money.
  • Improving your job search skills.
  • Developing your authentic brand.
  • Or even just properly setting goals.

Summer is a great time to catch up on your 2017 goals! To help you, I’m offering 15% off all paNASH on-demand programs. Use the discount code SUMMER at checkout. This offer is good beginning July 9th and lasts until July 16th. So maybe one of your first goals for the rest of this year is to take advantage of this offer on a resource that will kick your last half of 2017 into high gear!

Practice For Your Victory (Re-post)

This week marks the beginning of the NCAA tournament and March Madness. I thought it was appropriate to re-post this from 2016. It’s not just for basketball fans, but for anyone who loves an inspiring story of perseverance and dreams that come true!

It’s that time of the year again! College basketball tournament time, AKA “March Madness.”

Anyone who knows me well knows how passionate I am about college basketball and the madness of the NCAA tournament. Originally from North Carolina, college basketball and March Madness is in my blood.

My dad made it clear to me at a very young age that our household pulls for Carolina. When I was little, he bought me a UNC blue and white basketball and taught me how to play HORSE using our neighbor’s basketball goal. I’ve been a Tar Heel fan ever since.

When I was 8 years old, I remember rooting for the ’82 Carolina team in the NCAA championship game against Georgetown. That team included the great Michael Jordan. I was allowed to stay up late to watch Carolina beat Georgetown and be crowned the national champions.

A year later, I got to stay up late again to watch NC State (one of Carolina’s conference rivals) play in the ’83 championship game. That night, there was a bit of a shift in our household.

Doing the unthinkable, accomplishing the impossible

While we had always pulled for Carolina, my mother loved the coaching style of NC State’s Jim Valvano. She loved his enthusiasm and excitement. She loved how he wasn’t afraid to show emotion, unlike the even-keeled (which she called “boring”) coaches Dean Smith and Mike Krzyzewski.

Jimmy V’s enthusiasm and determination led an unlikely team to a national championship. The team was off to a bad start in the regular season, losing a total of 10 games. The only way they could even get to the NCAA tournament was to win the conference tournament, which seemed nearly impossible with their record.

Practice your victory

But Jimmy V was a big dreamer and a big believer in his dreams. He would schedule a practice every so often where his team would leave the basketballs on the ball rack, and instead grab a pair of scissors and practice cutting down the nets.

(For those of you who don’t know much about basketball, cutting down the nets is a celebratory ritual the winning team does when they’ve won a championship title.)

As the season went on, the NC State Wolfpack started improving their game, and were able to get past the previous year’s national champions, the UNC Tar Heels, to win the ACC tournament and make it to the national NCAA tournament. They got their first chance to cut down the nets!

Never give up

However, when they got to the national tournament, they weren’t expected to make it past the first round because they were the “Cinderella” team. They were one of the lowest-seeded teams in the tournament. One loss and they would be out. And they were up against some big giants.

But Jimmy V never gave up hope his team could win the whole thing. And guess what? They did! No other team has gone from such a low ranking to becoming the champions. Never before, and never since. NC State was such an underdog team. But they had so much heart, so much emotion, and so much enthusiasm.

On the night of the championship game, our household became Wolfpack fans. Everybody in North Carolina was so excited to see history being made, it didn’t matter if you were also a Duke or Carolina fan. That night, if you were a North Carolinian, you were an NC State fan.

I’ll never forget those last nail-biting seconds of the final game. When the winning basket was made, I remember my dad jumping out of his chair and raising his hands to the ceiling. I’ve never seen him look so tall!

I also remember seeing the now-famous scene of Jimmy V running around the court with unbridled emotion and excitement. And the Wolfpack got to do what they had practiced. They cut down those nets!

 
NCAA Tournament
Image courtesy of Unsplash

 

An inspiring example

This past weekend, my dad was visiting me from North Carolina and together we watched the ESPN 30 for 30 documentary of Jimmy V and his team accomplishing the impossible. I’ve personally seen the Survive and Advance documentary several times, and I always smile at Jimmy V’s passion for life and his love for his players, and I always cry when it shows his inspiring “Never Give Up” ESPY speech.

It was in this documentary where I first learned of the team practicing cutting down the nets. It was also in this documentary I first learned from the interview with Jimmy’s wife how he kept note cards of his goals in the inner pockets of his sports jackets. One said, “Win a national championship,” and one said, “Beat cancer.”

We know Jimmy V accomplished the first goal. And while we all know he didn’t beat his own personal battle with cancer, he is accomplishing his second goal through his Jimmy V Foundation he set up from his hospital room to help fund research to find a cure for cancer.

Cut down your nets

I share all this to remind you that life is short. Cancer cut both Jimmy V’s life and my mother’s life short. I also share this to ask you:

Are you living a life of passion and enthusiasm?

Are you putting your goals in writing?

Are you carrying them close to your heart?

Are you practicing for your own victories?

Are you practicing what it will be like and look like when you accomplish your goals and victories?

Those are pretty inspiring and powerful practices, especially when you see such an inspiring and powerful example of how those practices work.

If you’d like to watch the story of Jim Valvano and his ’83 Wolfpack team, you can watch Survive and Advance on YouTube. Even if you’re not a sports fan, I encourage you to watch it.

Jimmy V always said every day you should do three things:

  1. Laugh.
  2. Spend time in thought.
  3. Have your emotions moved to tears.

He said:

“If you laugh, think and cry in the same day, then you’ve had one heck of a day.” (Jim Valvano)

I guarantee the documentary will make you laugh, will make you cry, and will inspire you.

And if you’d like to set big goals for your own life, goals that lead to victory, join the paNASH mailing list to receive a complimentary Goal-Achievement Plan. Your practice for victory will lead to your victory.

Title photo source: http://southerntorch.com/area-champions-crowned-sub-regionals-set/

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Where Do You Want to Be at the End of 2017?

When you look back on 2016, were you happy with your efforts in the goals you had set for yourself a year ago? If not, what happened? What circumstances caused you to hit the pause button on your goals? It’s important to look back and consider these things because the good news is, it’s a new year and you get to have a do-over with your goals!

After you’ve looked back over the last year, it’s now time to look forward. The best way to successfully achieve your new year’s resolutions and goals for 2017 is to look ahead to the end of 2017. I challenge you to think about and visualize where you want to be at the end of the year.

Try to answer the following three questions:

What are 1-3 experiences you want to have in 2017?

Personally, I want to experience tiny living. I’m obsessed with home shows about tiny houses and wonder if I could actually live in such a space. Recently I found out about a place here in Tennessee where I can go and spend a few nights in a tiny house. Not only that, while there I’ll have the opportunity to go stand up paddle boarding and hiking, two of my passions!

What’s something you’ve always wanted to try? This could be the year to do it and develop a new passion.

What are 1-3 ways you want to get out of your comfort zone in 2017?

I want to challenge myself this year by going on my very first mission trip to Brazil. We’ll be traveling down the Amazon River on a small boat and sleeping in hammocks while making stops at small communities along the river. We’ll be helping with everything from construction and home visits to ministry.

I’ve been told by my church’s missions coordinator that if there was ever a mission trip to get you out of your comfort zone, this is the one! What’s something you could do this year that would challenge you and push you out of your comfort zone?

What are 1-3 goals you want to achieve in 2017?

My goal for my passion and career coaching business is to help even more people who currently feel stuck in their life or their work. I want to help provide direction on the next steps of their life and help them find a career that’s enjoyable and is a good fit for them.

What is something you’ve always wanted to achieve? Maybe it’s a personal goal, or maybe it’s a professional goal. It could even be a passion project, something you’ve always had a desire to do that’s outside the bounds of your normal work or life routine. Something that either feeds an interest or yours or gives back to society or accomplishes both!

I’m currently working on a passion project that combines my passion for writing, stand up paddling, and my love for God. It will also serve as a source of funding for my mission trip to Brazil.

When thinking about the questions above, be creative and don’t limit yourself. This year could be the year you look back and see just how exciting life can be!

What are your plans for 2017?

So let me ask you, what experiences do you have planned for 2017? I’d love to hear about them! Please share in the comment box below!